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26. srpna 2010 v 21:51 | Amantia Aceracea M.L. |  LES MISERABLES
European Tour 2008... it's been already some time sice they've started to chase their dreams...


"If that person you love is far more gentle than me, then this flower is only bound to die, to wither away."
-Lareine - Ano hito no aishita hito nara-

"Leave me!" Yuki was starting to sound upset, still it didn't convince Teru to stop pestering him by messing up his hair. The drummer was laying on a couch, trying to get some rest before the show this evening.
"Oh, come on, Yuki. You can't sleep your youth away, there's still so much to see."
"Just go alone, if you must," Kamijo said harshly.
"Perhaps you should try to rest now, Teru, just for a while," Hizaki passed beside him to the second room in the hotel where they were staying. He stopped in the doorway and flashed a smile for him. "There's still some time before the lunch and our usual afternoon walk."
"Teru, it's really great that you still have so much energy, but can't you just understand that we need to sleep now?" Yuki tried his best to choose the fines words, but it still didn't work. Teru made an upset noise, showing off his disapointment. "Fine then, I will go alone."

It's been like this since the first city they visited. First they came to the hotel, Teru watching the streets from the window of their tour bus. Right after they settled, Teru jumped out, asking others to join him on this walk and sightseeing, holding camera in his hand. At first it was fun and they joined him. Alas, his energy never faded off. As more shows were successfully behind them, other members started to feel tired and had no more desire to go out with Teru into every town they visited. Besides, they all looked quite similar. And they didn't truly come for sightseeing, did they?
After having lunch in a local restaurant, they went for a short walk together. People from the local staff usually accompanied them and showed them the rarities and places worth seeing. No need to browse through the whole city to find them for themselves. That way they had some time to rest a little and prepare for the show. Then things were all the same - playing for their international fans, making the show, heading back to the hotel, pack their things and move to the next stop with their bus, hoping for some rest.
It seemed like Jasmine You had the most weak endurance. He was eating scarcely and whenever had the time, he sat or laid on a couch and almost instantly fell asleep. But on the concert, he kept on shining as always, giving everything he had, playing the bass with all the passion he was hiding in his heart. Kamijo was staying with him, the two of them chatting silently and laughing, right until Jasmine didn't fade off to sleep of course. Hizaki preffered watching TV or listening to radio and Yuki liked to stay inside, reading or just resting a little, closing his eyes for a while. But Teru… he was a wild nature who couldn't be stopped. Even now, when all of them were truly exhausted before the last concert of their tour, he had enough energy to leave them and wander off to the streets of the city. Yuki merely shook his head. I only hope he gets back allright.

"Paris is awesome," stated Teru when they met up in a restaurant, putting his camera on the table.
"No doubts," Kamijo grinned back at him. The waitress brought menus and cold juicy drinks ordered before. Teru immediately took one and started to drink.
"Next time you should take bottle of water with yourself," Jasmine You admonished him softly. Teru laughed back, winked at Kamijo, saying: "Look who's talking. Take care of yourself, You, if you have time to be concerned about me."
"As you wish, Teru. I merely tried to remind you of drinking properly, so you wouldn't get dehydratated."
"Then you should eat properly and make us all happy. Don't tell me what to do, I'm fine."
"I am, too," but they both seemed a little hurt.
"Being concerned about the others makes you feel upset? Now, that is a strange thing indeed," Kamijo smiled at his friends from behind the huge menu.
"It's just not funny at all when You's fading out," Teru whispered silently so everybody could pretend that they didn't hear it, Jasmine You above them all. Yuki merely raised his eyebrows, so Teru knew he heard. But no one ever said anything on that matter. And Yuki wondered if Teru, that wild and enthusiastic Teru, is truly being serious right now, concerned deeply over the bassist's health. Of course, not even Yuki thought that Teru could be that cold and uncaring. It was just that he always tried to make fun of things, no matter how grim they were. And sometimes he was doing and saying things that made others feel hurt. But Yuki belived that it was never in Teru's intentions. Though he always thought only the best about Teru, it still surprised him now, how concerned and serious Teru seemed to be, his usual smile gone.

They were eating in silence, Yuki watching his friend closely. Teru's smile in a soft form was back on his lips, tasting the local food. It wasn't such a big deal to make Teru jump out of joy. Little things, minor details could bring up a smile up to his face. Sweet air, birds singing, funny statuette, leaves falling down, shadows flickering beneath the trees or merely a good tasty meal. He could seem a simple person - but was he?

Yuki wondered why he couldn't get Teru out of his mind. These past days - no, past months - Teru managed to capture his attention almost everytime they've met. With his carefree nature, his funny comments, little pranks he played at them during rehearsals, travelling and then even during this tour. His laughter made Yuki laugh with him. Ah, but it was a strange thing indeed. He liked Teru, he was a good companion to have around, but after some time he grew tired of him (wasn't that a too strong word to use?) and Yuki wanted to be left alone. It was almost impossible on this tour. Teru was near him; he never saw him coming, he just suddenly appeared right there beside (or worse, behind) him. It was frightening, but somehow his attention made Yuki happy.
"Let's take a photo here," Teru already had his camera prepared. "I will ask the waitress to take a photo of us all together. It will be a nice picture, ne?"
"I don't like to take photos when I'm not dressed up," Hizaki pouted slightly. Teru made a grimase back at him.
"You look fantastic, Hizaki, as always. It's not the dress that make a beautiful princess out of you."
"Now I'm not sure if that was a compliment."
"It's for you to decide, my dear."

My dear? Yuki knew that Teru was close with everyone or so it seemed. Perhaps it was because of his warm and opened nature. He socialized easily, contradictory to Yuki, who was "as cold as snow sometimes" as Teru said once.
They gathered closer together and smiled into the camera. After they sat back on their seats, Teru kept on laughing at Yuki. The drummer gave him a curious look, remembering how it felt when during the photo-taking Teru hugged him from behind, leaning to him closely and putting his chin on Yuki's shoulder. "What?"
"Just wait for the photo, Yuki, you will see."
"What did you do?"
Teru kept on grinning, not telling anything. Kamijo couldn't stand Yuki's horrified look, so he explained it to him. "He was biting your hair, didn't you feel it?"
Yuki touched his hair in fear and frowned at Teru. "Can't you stop acting like a spoiled kid, Teru? What you do is all wrong." It's all wrong what you're doing to me!
"All wrong? I remember you saying that you liked me and that my acting was fine as well. When has it changed?"
"It hasn't. It's just that-," Yuki was trying to find the correct words. "You're like a nice little dog, fun to look at. It's just that I wouldn't want that dog at my place, because it's way too difficult to handle it."
"Ouch, now that hurt," Teru grinned. "If I had a tail, I would draw it between my legs and back away from you."
"Forget it. There's no sense to be saying anything to you. Nothing would change."

Their "usual short afternoon walk" had started. Teru was in front of them, jumping happily around and taking a lot of photos. Yuki kept his distance from him, yet eying him warily. When did it changed so much? When did he start to feel concerned about Teru so much? It was indeed all wrong, because he would like to go with Teru for a nice walk, but without all that running around and taking photos at every corner, bridge, fountain or a funny named shop. He wanted to talk with him more. There were times when they had more "serious" conversations. It was a nicely spent afternoon and evening, too, and after that Yuki realized he wanted it even more. But was it possible for Teru to feel the same? Was it possible for him to act peacefully just for a while? He enjoyed the life, drinking the youth with all his might. He was an unstoppable wind that couldn't be tied to one single place, one single person. But he is tied to Versailles and so to me as well, isn't he?

Weird thoughts were filling Yuki's mind, thoughts he never ever imagined to have. Somewhere along the way he lost the feeling for the boundery between friendship and love and now he didn't know what he felt for Teru anymore. He enjoyed their time together, like a friend would. That was as clear as the sunny sky above them. But he liked the way Teru sometimes touched him - playing with his hair, stroking and hugging him. Being shown such an affection was a wonderful thing and he dreamed of being the only one to be shown this affection. But he knew he wasn't. Teru had this habit of his to go around and demonstrate how much he cared for and loved his friends, never once hesitating to go into the physical contact when he deemed it right - or when he just wanted it.

Teru turned around and waved at them to follow him. Yuki had a feeling that in fact Teru was looking only at him and no one else. That the wide smile on his lips belonged only to him. That's when he remembered, when he got lost on his path. It was that evening when both of them went for a drink. When they were walking home, Teru suddenly turned to Yuki, hugged him and kissed his cheek. "You're an angel, Yuki. I wish I could be like you." Back then Yuki embraced the white-haired guitarist and pet his shoulder. His fingers touched those soft silky hair and he wished to be able to tell Teru that he liked him as well. That for him, it was Teru who was like an angel, perhaps a little too wild, but still an angel of eternal happiness. And he craved for this happiness so much, knowing that while he would stay with Teru he would be happy. He wished he could remain with Teru like this forever. Perhaps Teru was showing his affection to others as well. But Yuki was the only one, as far as he knew, who received a kiss from him. And that counted a lot more than random touches, didn't it?


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